Is that too much to ask for?

All-I-really-want-to-do-is-spend-my-life-travelling-the-world-reading-books-that-take-my-breath-awayI saw this quote on Twitter the other night and it made me gasp.

This is what I want. Exactly what I want. (Well, not exactly. As my friend Kate pointed out, you could replace “tea” with “wine”…)

I mean, I know I’m hardly unique in this. I know this is probably the perfect life for many many people, but… when I saw it, something sparked inside me. Because I do want that. Exactly that (with wine) and I’ve wanted it for as long as I can remember. But do I spend my life in a way that’s bringing me closer to that? Nope. 

I love my life. I’ve written before about how I used to get upset when the cherry blossom arrived because it meant another year had gone by and I still felt… stuck. I don’t feel like that now. I love writing books (book news soon, I hope). I love home educating. I love my husband and my boys and my house (although I’d love my house more if I could move it to another town). I love myself (and it’s taken me a long time to say that!). 

But I find it so easy to get stuck in a rut. I’m kind of lazy and even though I do a lot of stuff, I don’t really do it as well or as much as I could. When I read Brené Brown on “wholehearted” living, it made my heart beat faster. Because I am half-hearted. In almost everything. (So I guess at least I’m wholly half-hearted…) And I don’t want to be that way anymore. 

I’m 42. Time is passing. Fast. My boys are growing up. I always tell myself we’ll have more money in the future, we’ll be able to live the way we want to in the future. But I’ve been telling myself that for – what? – 30 years now? I need to do what I can now to make sure we do have more. More travel, more books, more tea, more writing, more wine.


10 thoughts on “Is that too much to ask for?

  1. This. This is me. The quote, at least (although I might possibly change the tea/win for coffee. Or coffee *and* wine). I’m a way off from achieving even as much as you have yet. And I’m older than you. Eek.

  2. I know what you mean but don’t forget to give yourself some credit for all the stuff you do get done Keris! Look how much you’ve changed your life already. And at least you know where you want to be heading, so maybe you could make a list of babysteps that would nudge life towards your vision and get one done each week, so you know you’re making progress.

    1. Thanks, Jo (and hello!). I do give myself some credit, honestly – in the last 10 years I’ve changed pretty much everything. I just don’t want it to take another 10 years, you know? Baby steps is a good idea, thanks. 🙂

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